Top Reasons that The 52 Vincents, Winners of the 2011 Rapha NE Gent's Race didn't get an automatic invite to the 2012 Race

  • Only three gentlemen - what's with this Gender Balanced Team stuff ! No more neutralizing the testosterone.
  • No Visible Tattoos - I told the guys it was pointless to have Rapha tattooed on their balls, since no one wants to see those photos !
  • Took the race too seriously - showed up with fat tires, low gears, good brakes, and lots of long distance and climbing experience !
  • Didn't take the race seriously enough - spent the day making rapture jokes !
  • No grimaces - actually smiling in all the photos !
  • Rode too damn fast, the videographer couldn't even catch us !
  • Had too much fun !
  • Showed up all the single bikes by finishing first on tandems !
  • Didn't use the words, epic or sufferfest, in the ride report ! (but seriously over-used the exclamation point)
  • Finished the 2011 event before the Rapture - so maybe we don't actually exist in this post-rapturous world !
Today, we bring you the Epic Avengers, a reprise of the 52 Vincents Gender-balanced team with very few visible tattoos, who have been training all winter, and even came up with a brand new theme, in hopes of getting one of the extra invites to the 2012 Rapha NE Gentleperson's Race, so we can defend our title. Come on Rapha. We want to prove it wasn't a fluke!

1 comment:

  1. This team displays a complete and contemptible lack of ennui.